i think i'm heading towards a downward spiral, now that i'm (at this moment, happily) unemployed.
i wake up, eat, do my couch potato thing, and spend the evening with mas. i dont know if he's gonna get tired of me or vice versa soon.
i'm a useless bum. i really am.
i dont want to find a job, because i dont know what i want to do. and it doesnt help that everyone is pushing me to get an idea soon.
whats wrong with not working? why does society put a stigma on those who dont work? why should i start looking for a job before i quit my job or immediately after?
it is as if im a retard if i dont earn money. im not asking anyone for any right?
who else experiences a mid-life burnout at age 22? raise your hand please.
none? ok.
hey ive been working since i was 15. got a semi career going at age 20 and earning a decent salary. i work so much, i dont even get my deserved days off.
so stop bugging me to get a job ok?
i went to job sites to look at whats avail. and i still draw a blank at what i should do.
too amateur for HR, too accomplished at scratching the surface of at least 4 job titles.
i am in a rut. but i will get myself out of it. in time. i havent even bummed for a month, for goodness sake.
maybe i should serve the ministry. and by that i mean the church, not the govt, thank you very much.
but the govt does pay well i hear. ok enough.
i've been so free, ive been thinking too much in my free time, which is all the time. i keep telling myself i want everyday with mas to be happy happy happy. no quarrels, no sadness, no unhappiness.
but i think, what happens when i get a job and wont be able to meet so often anymore? (ps i meet him every single freaking day, talk about devotion...)
will we drift? will we get tired of keeping things up?
and everything's been good, i dont know why i keep wanting more than what he can give. am i being abnormal?
almost everything is perfect, so why am i grumbling? i tell myself to stop. "oi, stop ok?"
thats how i remind myself.
a few trips coming up ahead, genting with mom sis bro, kelong with goodness knows who. thank goodness i dont smoke, else i'll wither in misery with their presence. you guys know who will suffer eh.
bkk with mas may be confirmed soon. i hope it does. although i really dont want him to spend the money. hmm, maybe thats what i should do. id rather he get me a something. a something than a trip. cause you can always get someone trips. its just money. and i have enough of that at this moment. trips and money.
what i really want is new york. i'm dreaming of a white christmas. keyword dreaming. times square, and not the one in my new monopoly set.
my new monopoly set! great bday gift sis! if only you didnt open it up beforehand to use the dice with jackie jack xiao mao. who knows what they did with it.
monopoly electronic banking! eat your heart out. cashless transactions maan. abit mahfan but i still love it. and btw, i lost to my sis on the virgin game. bah. ill look for someone to trash.
my facebook account is sooo not moving. as in, nothings happening there. ah well.
movies i wanna catch: the happening (ooh m.night, intelligent name!), kungfu panda (at first i thought it was some lame stephen chow show with chinese jokes, cause their posters were up the same time as "droolsome" jay chou/chow?'s kungfu basketball or something like that.) ps i dislike jack black and a.jolie *pui. but it looks like a really funny panda.
ok i forgot what other shows i wanna catch. never mind then.
i'm rambling.
